Travel moods: Respite, however brief

    It’s not even March, and already I have a raging desire to get-the-heck-out. I’ve been putting in long hours — I always put in long hours, truth be told — but lately the timbre of it has changed. It feels necessary, essential; it’s not just what I need to do to keep ahead of things and provide the high level of service I think my customers deserve… it’s what I need to do to keep from actually falling behind.

    I’ve got 2 competing sets of responsibilities right now. One that I know well and do well; it’s a full-time job but at least I have a comfort level at it. The other is new, which means I’m learning. Learning is good. But it also means it takes a lot more brainpower, and time I don’t have,and gives me a ton more stress. The performance anxiety is just awful.

    The result is that I need almost 2 days for every 1 day I work. I can barely remember the last time I worked less than 10 hours a day. I do a lot of half-days lately (12 hour workdays) and last week I went to a conference where between the early starts and the full days and the evening outings, and then the necessity to log in and try to catch up on things that would otherwise pile up beyond my ability to manage them… I worked 15 hour days.

    In warmer surroundings, mind you. It wasn’t all bad. 🙂

    I try not to work on the weekends, other than to catch up on some of the reading I should be getting done and there just isn’t time for. Mostly I spend the weekends taking care of errands and letting my brain vegetate a bit. (Literally, in that I have a minor Farmville addiction going on.)

    Even so, last week’s 15-hour/day marathon did me in. I did very close to nothing all weekend — church and auto maintenance notwithstanding — and it wasn’t enough to recover. I still feel like I am really burnt out. I need to get out of here. I need to get away and unplug from all of this. Seriously.

    Seriously, who am I kidding? I know that if I go away, I will spend the week before stressed out even more because I need to clear my desk. And I will spend the week after stressed out trying to catch up. By the time I get behind my desk again, a vacation already seems like a distant memory; long ago and far away.

    “How was your trip?” Gosh, I don’t remember. And it was just yesterday.

    I need a break.

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About aka gringita
Flotsam generator. Amateur photographer. Avid traveler. Christ follower.

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