Where was this knowledge 5 days ago?

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Not to overthink things too much, but … well, I do that and it’s not likely to stop today.

So New Year’s was approaching and I was thinking of sending a quick note to someone. Thinking to try to get it there before New Year’s because the note at New Year’s could have… undesired and unintentional undertones.

Then I got an email from someone that very day and it reminded me that any “happy new year” message, before or after, had the same potential. So I did not send it at that time.

But they’ve still been on my mind, and so earlier this week I sent a quick note to them. Just to say Hi. Just because I’m thinking of them.

What? People do that…

OK, no they don’t. The accepted social convention is that you do not drop a line to someone for no reason. And “I was just thinking of you” is not a reason. At least, not for normal people.

Well, I’ve always been better at “socially awkward” than at “social convention.” I should try to trust in the fact that people who know me, and get me, get that about me. Like me in spite of it. Who knows? There might even be a few who like me because of it.

I should take my own advice to get over myself. I should not listen to the person who suggested that it would be all right that I sent that note with no reason, because the recipient would probably just think I was in love with him…

Wait? What? NO! Dude, that is NOT funny!

Groan: WHY doesn’t the post office have a “recall” option?

No, it will be fine. I will not have given that impression. Probably. They’ll just think I’m toothache-sweet, and …  well…

They’ll feel a little uncomfortable about it.

Oh yes, they will.  I know this. At least, now I do.

Because today I got a card, just for no reason. From one of my girlfriends who used to live here and moved away a few years ago. She sent me a note just to say thoughtful and kind things.

I once had coffee with a guy who was in love with her. He told me that she is the sweetest person he’d ever met. The sweetest person in the whole world.

You know what? He might have been right.

You know what else? A person does not have to be confused into thinking there’s any “in-love” message behind it (obviously my friend is not “in love” with me)… in fact a person can be well aware that the note is just the sender being their own sweet self, and they can appreciate that, and love that about the person…

… and still get a squidgy, undeserving, uncomfortable feeling about it.

Freaking beautiful.

Where was this knowledge 5 days ago, when it could have done me some good?

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About aka gringita
Flotsam generator. Amateur photographer. Avid traveler. Christ follower.

One Response to Where was this knowledge 5 days ago?

  1. Pingback: Last I checked, that’s not a crime « aka Gringita

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